Restless Heart
by Socket-58
Summary: Everything about him annoys her, so how can they have a future?


Pairing: Laura Roslin/Tigh

Timeline: Set during/after 'Six Degree's of Separation'

Spoilers: Secrets and Lies.

Disclaimer: If wishes were ponies… but Ronald D. Moore and Universal Studios own everything Galactica. I own my imagination. Don't sue!

A/N: Sequel to 'Hanging By A Moment'

**Restless Heart**

Roslin is on her feet; she's trying to pretend she's fine after her collapse earlier today. She's not fine. She feels queasy, her vision is slightly blurry and she's having trouble concentrating… but she's an expert at appearances and she knows she looks fine.

Laura's at her desk, speaking with Billy when Tigh walks into her office without knocking. He stands in the doorway and the young aide notices Roslin glance up at the Colonel's surprise visit.

"That's all for now, Ma'am," Billy says and hurriedly exits, the President and Tigh have a volatile relationship that he can't quite fathom and he doesn't want to get caught in the crossfire.

Laura removes her glasses. "To what do I owe this pleasure?" she asks glibly.

The XO takes a step forward and then glances at the open door. He closes it and moves towards her desk. "I heard about the… incident earlier," he explains.

She nods and rubs her eyes. "It's nothing…" she lies.

He frowns. "Laura - "

She gives him a sharp look. "What's this Colonel Tigh? Concern?"

The XO takes a step back, as if she's just hit him. "Yes… concern for our leader – hardly setting a good example, is it? When the going gets tough – the tough pass out!"

Laura wants to smash something, preferably his skull. Instead, she wears her practised smile of tolerance and says. "Colonel, I'd hate to think I was keeping you from bullying some naïve Ensign, please, don't let me detain you from your busy schedule."

His eyes narrow. "Ma'am," he salutes and then heads for the door without looking back.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Later that evening, Tigh feels frustrated; he can't drink and he needs a drink… needs an escape from the confines of his misery. His past is haunting him and he seeks Laura out: he wants to feel needed or something more; something only she can provide.

He waits till Billy has left before he steals into Roslin's quarters. She has her back to the doorway when the XO enters. She's already removed her jacket and is unzipping her skirt when he asks. "Need a hand with that, Madame President?"

Startled, Roslin swirls on her heels to face him. He leans against the wall, staring at her. She's annoyed by his behaviour, but everything about him annoys her. "No, I'm perfectly capable of managing a zip all by myself," she retorts.

"You sure?" he says facetiously. "Don't be too proud to ask for help – we don't want you wearing yourself out and fainting again."

She glares at him. "Aren't you supposed to be working tonight?"

He crosses the room and she does the zip of her skirt up.

"I swapped shifts," he answers. "I wanted to… I don't know what the right words are. I'm no good at this, Laura. I wanted to be here. With you."

And maybe the real reason she chose him was because she can hurt him more than he can hurt her.

"I don't need you or your sympathy," she states; she just wants to ensure their emotional boundaries are still in place. All they have is based on a moment of weakness and she wants to be able to switch it on-and-off.

"I'm not offering my sympathies," he grins as he moves closer to her. "I'm offering my services for the night."

"Not tonight…" she replies.

Tigh slips his arms around her waist and kisses her neck. Laura rests her hands against his chest; she's tired and her brain is telling her to rest, but her body wants him. His chest is hot and firm beneath her hands and she thinks that maybe now is the best time to end it, but she hates goodbyes… and she's still touching him… and then their lips meet and they're moving towards her bed.

Tigh is gentler with her than usual, his touch is softer, his kisses lighter and she thinks maybe there is some sensitivity beneath that rough exterior. But she doesn't want to think too much about it, not now, not ever.

Afterwards, he lies beside her, his arm about her and when he leans close to whisper, "I love you", Laura reaches out and covers his mouth with her hand.

"Don't say it," she murmurs.

He nods his understanding and she drops her hand to her side. Silence is easy for them; they never have much to say and now, in this moment, words seem more of a commitment somehow.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Laura is walking through the corridors aboard _Galactica_, her white nightdress flowing about her. She hears screams behind her and turns to see armed Cylon soldiers shooting at people. She starts to run, her chest tightens as panic sets-in and she turns a corner… she has to reach the Bridge… has to warn Adama…

She enters the Bridge and rushes over to Lee, who is standing beside his father at the ops table. She tries to speak, but her voice is gone. Apollo smiles at her. She shakes him and indicates the danger, but he just keeps smiling. She turns to Adama; he nods respectfully at her, then looks back at the logistics map.

The Cylon's storm the Bridge and open fire. Tigh grabs her arm and pulls her to safety behind a bulkhead. She looks into his eyes, he presses himself against her and kisses her, his grip tightens… and he's crushing her… she can't breathe…

Laura awakes with a start. She's drenched in sweat, her hair matted. She's alone in her bed and for once, she wishes Tigh had stayed. She just wants to feel the comfort of someone beside her. Since the doctor gave her that shot, she's been more prone to nightmares and it's always soothing to hear someone else's breathing, the heat of another body… makes her feel less alone. But she is alone.

Sitting up unsteadily, Laura catches her breath and then stands. She makes her way to the bathroom and splashes her face with cold water. She avoids looking at her reflection. She can't quite stomach the image of herself; she looks more like her mother everyday.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

The following evening, Roslin walks into the Mess hall looking for Apollo, when she's greeted by the sight of Tigh sitting at a table nursing a drink and talking with a young blonde woman. He leans in close to the blonde and they start laughing. Laura finds her feet carrying her towards them - she wants to run away, but her first instinct is always to fight.

She stands behind them. "Hope I'm not interrupting anything!" the President says coolly.

Tigh immediately pulls away from the blonde, he turns and stares at Roslin, a guilty expression consumes his face. He stands up. "Uh – Lau – Madame President…"

She gives him a detached smile. "I see you've made a new friend, Colonel," and she glances scornfully at the young woman.

Tigh thinks of his wife, thinks maybe he's falling for Laura because she's the opposite of his wife: Roslin is contained, Ellen was out of control. Roslin thinks first, then acts. Ellen did what she wanted when she wanted and damn the consequences. Ellen was never good enough for him and Laura is too good for him.

The XO puts his drink down and he moves as if to touch Roslin. Instinctively, she draws back.

"As you were, Colonel," she says, her voice low and filled with betrayal. "No need to spoil your fun on my account," and she turns and walks away.

Tigh stares after her and feels the walls closing in, he thinks of Ellen, of that wrenching feeling he used to suffer with her continuous flirting… the humiliation… the anger… and then he finds himself chasing after Laura; which he's never done before. He never felt he had the right, but now he has this urge to make her understand.

He catches up with her in the corridor. "Can we talk?" he asks.

"There's nothing for us to say," she replies coldly, then looks at him sadly. "There never is," and her pace increases.

"Stop running from me!" he demands.

Roslin comes to a standstill.

The Colonel sighs. "You'll share your bed with me, but not your thoughts and feelings… I'm tired of the way you treat me - like I'm worthless."

"You're not worthless, Tigh," she says softly, Laura folds her arms across her chest and then looks at him. "I'm protective of my inner world - maybe it's a defence mechanism, a habit, an excuse to not get hurt – but it's my way of coping. Do you understand?"

"We all find a way to cope," the Colonel says sympathetically.

His sympathy offends her, like he pities her constraint. She feels her defences go up and before she can stop herself, the words are out of her mouth. "Yes – your way of coping seems to entail flirting with drunken women half your age. Is it easier to pick them up if their judgement is impaired?"

He glares at her. "Your judgement wasn't impaired when you threw yourself at me – so what's your excuse?"

"Loneliness," Roslin admits.

There's a silence.

She looks trampled upon. "You're right – we need to talk about this properly."

His eyes soften. "Lets go somewhere private."

Laura nods and he places his hand on the small of her back and leads the way to his quarters.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

As soon as the XO closes the hatch to his room, he says. "I was flirting, that's all… nothing would have come of it."

"I'm not your keeper – you're entitled to do what you like," she retorts.

"Why are you always like this? A frakkin' ice box where your heart should be?"

"Why are you so predictable – so weak?" Laura yells. "As soon as my back is turned you're all over some blonde!"

"I wasn't all over her – she was talking to me, something you'd know nothing about because you're so frakkin' selfish!" the Colonel shouts back. "You never think about what I want – what I need… it's always about you, isn't it Laura?"

Roslin gives him a fierce look. "This is over. We are over!"

"Did 'we' ever begin?" he asks. "I mean, we have nothing – no personal attachment, no feelings to be hurt…"

"No," she agrees.

He pounds the back of a chair with his fist. "Damn it Laura – why do you have to make everything so complicated?"

Roslin feels the heat rising to her cheeks. "How's this for simple? I don't want you, I don't need you – I don't even like you!" she shouts emotionally.

Then his hands are in her hair and her arms are about him. He backs her against the wall and her lips cover his. They're ripping at each other's clothes and thinking stops.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Roslin stirs from sleep, she lies still for a moment, realizing that she's not in her room… that he is beside her. Laura turns and looks at Tigh, he's sound asleep and a smile comes to her lips. She wants to check herself for this reaction; but she's tired of playing games, of pretending she doesn't feel something she does. She was jealous when she saw him with another woman… she has affection for him and she wants to be here.

Tigh opens his eyes and looks at her. "Hey," he says softly.

"Hey," Laura replies.

He kisses her cheek and they lay motionless.

"Does this mean there's hope for us?" he asks.

"Hope is a dangerous thing," she replies softly.

They hold each other's gaze.

"Maybe…" she adds optimistically.

He smiles. She listens to her heartbeat… his breathing… the future is still unwritten and she thinks, maybe this is where their book really begins.

The End


End file.
